January lifestyle change clowns

This is what pisses me off the most. The trend-hoppers who only show up somewhere if they feel it's trendy and timely, and not out of conviction, not even in the slightest, but just as a self-justification, or to be part of something they don't understand, aren't even interested in, but since they've read and heard so much about it, they have to show up. They justify their importance by being at these supposedly trendy events where life happens, where they are part of the hype culture, because anything many people follow must be good. Because you know, you're individuals. Where there's a crowd, you have to be there too.

God, how I hate these people. They sit in front of me in football jerseys, and then if I ask them six months later who they rooted for in the World Cup, they have to think for a bit, then say Brazil, but only because they remember the yellow color, and then when I ask them to name a few players, the idiot replies:

"Uhhhh Ronaldo... or is he not Brazilian?" Your mom.

But the real hell is the appearance of women, naturally at the same global events, with the same motivations I listed above, and right at the beginning, a question. What the hell are those women doing in front of the big screens at the World Cup group matches, from whom I can't see anything, and who, on all other days of the year, not only don't give a damn about football, but actively protest against it, and of course, always want to have sex and want my attention when I want to watch 2x45 minutes in peace. Not during halftime, no, damn it, noooo. Then, magically, the desire to be attended to disappears, and in fact, then comes the "watch your stupid football, don't just have 15 minutes for me" nagging and sulking, and then in the second half, everything starts all over again. How much more of it is there? I guess this is a familiar question, naturally 3 minutes after kickoff, and these women are sitting in front of me. But what are they doing, they're talking nonsense to each other.

Well, this is exactly what annoys me in gyms during the first few weeks of the year. I say weeks, because a full month would be an exaggeration. At the beginning of the year, this same army of out-of-place clueless people invades gyms, because new year, new resolutions, "I'll finally look good by summer" mantras, but of course, they don't take it seriously, just like last year, and the year before, or even 8 years ago. They come to the gym because they don't want to obviously spit in their own faces, and well, the monthly pass has already been bought, but everyone knows the end. The end will be a big nothing, and the January-starters know this too, those who go regularly and not just from January 3rd to 15th, and then we shouldn't be annoyed when there's no locker or machine free because of them?

I'd be the happiest if these people kept coming for longer than the life cycle of a water spider, but of course, there's no such thing. They bumble around the gym a few times, then gracefully give up after 2-3 weeks, with thoughts like "there's still plenty of time until summer, I'll start in March, or April, but then I'll be really, truly serious, and no appeals." The brand new shoes and the newly purchased, color-coordinated workout gear are certainly already there for it.

And how do I know they won't stay? It's written all over their faces. No conviction, no belief, no real determination, nothing. Just that "I need a good physique, but I have no desire for any of this" expression, that boredom, that disgust at the sight of the machines, like seeing a defecating homeless person on the street. For these people, the machines don't represent a better life, sports, proper metabolism, or the many positive developments provided by the machines, but rather symbolize the object of their suffering, which they truly, utterly, have no desire for.

And around mid-to-late January, these people gracefully disappear, just as they did last year, the year before, and just as they will disappear next year. They give up at the first obstacle, because cardio is too hard, gym training is too strenuous, there's a good chance they haven't stuck to their diet for 5 days, even though they only started 10 days ago, and poof, they find themselves in February at some Zumba nonsense, or some similarly silly, incredibly big, worthless joke. So that's my problem with the January gym-goers.

But wait, I left out the best part, because I should be praising these people for even showing up, and encouraging them not to give up, because that's supposed to be my duty, not discouraging them from the start with such posts.

Well then, let's clarify something. I don't coddle idiots, people incapable of a life outside their comfort zone, who are as sensitive as a mimosa, or so pliable that their nails might break. I don't applaud because someone managed to go to a gym within the framework of an obvious campaign-like lifestyle change, even though they don't really take it seriously, and even not being there would be better than the work they do there, because, as I said, at least they wouldn't tie up the machines, I'd have a locker, and I wouldn wouldn't have to wait 25 minutes for some ridiculous bird to stop facebooking and kindly finish their "workout."

When will people understand that performance is a longer process? When I see that the people who wandered in in January are still there in February, God forbid in March, and their gaze doesn't convey "I'm sick of this, what am I doing here," but rather some kind of fire, or a REAL willingness to change, then I will be the first to encourage them and tell them that they look great, the change is very noticeable, keep it up. Then I'll even correct a few of their exercises, but until I see that, no one should expect anything from me, because zero performance deserves exactly zero recognition.

Don't sit in front of me at the damn World Cup or Champions League final if that's the first match you watch that year, and don't only go to the gym for the first two weeks of January and occupy the machines from me, if you won't have anything to do with training for the rest of the year.